Never "Try" to be humble
A post after a long time here. Nevertheless, I have been wanting to write about this for a long time.
What is humility? As per the dictionary, humility is a state of being modest where one does not feel that he is better than or worse than the others. But, according to me, humility is a quality got only when the ego or the feeling of "I" is totally reduced. He doesn't feel anything when he is being praised or is being criticised. Both appear similar to him and he is able to accept them with ease.
Many of us consider being humble as a virtue. Hence, we behave in a manner such that others think that we are humble. I think most of us have experienced this "trying to be humble" kind of behaviour amongst our friends. In fact, most of us also belong to this category. Suppose you 'truly' appreciate or praise your friend for something he has achieved, on most occasions, he immediately will reject the praise and say he does not deserve it or will say he hasn't really achieved anything and there is nothing in it to be lauded. Now, do you think he really is telling the truth? Surely not. He knows that he has achieved something good and wants every one to appreciate him, a sure sign of ego. But once some one appreciates, he 'tries' to be humble and hence, he rejects the praise externally but internally, he is very happy about the fact that some one has praised him. Now, one can obviously tell that there is a mismatch between the internal feeling and external behaviour. By 'trying' to be humble, he actually loses one another noble quality called as truthfulness where there is total match between between the internal feeling and the external behaviour. Moreover, we try to be humble also because we want others to tell that we are humble in spite of our achievements or positions. The ego gets a great satisfaction of being called as humble.
Thus, by 'trying' to be humble, our ego is boosted, thus taking us further and further away from true humility and also takes as away from truthfulness by creating a false identity for ourselves. I feel it is better to accept that I am arrogant or egoistic than 'trying' to be humble because here at least the truth is present and the very fact that we are true to ourselves can help us lose our ego and become truly humble. At least to me, this is a great lesson learnt but have found it very difficult to implement. I have been living like this for years now and suddenly realise it is very detrimental. Surely, I need a dramatic change in this regard.
What is humility? As per the dictionary, humility is a state of being modest where one does not feel that he is better than or worse than the others. But, according to me, humility is a quality got only when the ego or the feeling of "I" is totally reduced. He doesn't feel anything when he is being praised or is being criticised. Both appear similar to him and he is able to accept them with ease.
Many of us consider being humble as a virtue. Hence, we behave in a manner such that others think that we are humble. I think most of us have experienced this "trying to be humble" kind of behaviour amongst our friends. In fact, most of us also belong to this category. Suppose you 'truly' appreciate or praise your friend for something he has achieved, on most occasions, he immediately will reject the praise and say he does not deserve it or will say he hasn't really achieved anything and there is nothing in it to be lauded. Now, do you think he really is telling the truth? Surely not. He knows that he has achieved something good and wants every one to appreciate him, a sure sign of ego. But once some one appreciates, he 'tries' to be humble and hence, he rejects the praise externally but internally, he is very happy about the fact that some one has praised him. Now, one can obviously tell that there is a mismatch between the internal feeling and external behaviour. By 'trying' to be humble, he actually loses one another noble quality called as truthfulness where there is total match between between the internal feeling and the external behaviour. Moreover, we try to be humble also because we want others to tell that we are humble in spite of our achievements or positions. The ego gets a great satisfaction of being called as humble.
Thus, by 'trying' to be humble, our ego is boosted, thus taking us further and further away from true humility and also takes as away from truthfulness by creating a false identity for ourselves. I feel it is better to accept that I am arrogant or egoistic than 'trying' to be humble because here at least the truth is present and the very fact that we are true to ourselves can help us lose our ego and become truly humble. At least to me, this is a great lesson learnt but have found it very difficult to implement. I have been living like this for years now and suddenly realise it is very detrimental. Surely, I need a dramatic change in this regard.
12 Comments:
Surely what you say is true! Any action can be traced back to some kind of selfish motive behing it. Ofcourse it could be of varying degrees. Once you have identified this, its a matter of time it comes into practice.
Once you have identified this, its a matter of time it comes into practice.
what do you mean by this? what should come into practice?
it is a mistake i wrote the same thing twice. but the fact i wanted to emphasise was the concept that true humility comes only when the I is reduced to the fullest extent possible which is not a part of the dictionary definition.
moreover the intention of this post was not to discuss about the dictionary definition of the word humility but to give an opinion that trying to be humble is not good.
you have no comments on that part, huh?
i would like to take this matter a little further..
put the question "why does one try to be humble?". The answer to that will tell you that the damage is done much before one "tries" to be humble. Read further if it is not clear..
One tries to be humble, when one already has in mind the idea that one has done something commendable, and is worth appreciation, but is also aware that allowing this thought to get over him/her is detrimental. The heart has already ascended the high plateau of self-aggrandisement, but the brain wants to stay low. It is this dichotomy which leads to an external behaviour different from the internal state of mind. The damage therefore occurs when one is conscious of one's work, and its relative worth in the eyes of the world. If only we were not conscious of what we do, or we didn't think that what we do is great, then there is no dichotomy, and hence, there is no attempt to be humble.
It is not possible to be not conscious of what we do* (see later). But then, it is definitely much easier to see the falsity in the relative worth that the world has ascribed to different actions. Once we see this falsity, it is easy to understand that there is nothing great in one deed than in another. All deeds are just deeds. There is nothing great in philanthrophy, in sacrifice, in loving everyone. The greatness is an attribute given by those who cannot rise themselves up to that level, and they do so in ignorance. Only another ignorant fool will go by the opinions of an ignorant man. The wise will not, and hence, he will not buy these definitions of great and small.
Coming back to being conscious of the actions performed... while it is impossible to be not conscious of the action, it is very much possible to not take credit for those actions at a mental level. This can be done by repeatedly suggesting to ourself that it is not "I" that does the work, which after sometime can lead to the realisation regarding the true doer of any action. This correlates closely to the Karma Yoga of the Gita, where we do not think we do anything, but instead think that it is the Lord that does everything. If this realisation occurs, then also the dichotomy doesn't arise.
hey u made a lot of sense. but this ignoramus thing made a lot more sense..huh ignoramus!!!
This is something i r
@Toxsik
What does that mean?
Hi, Im from Melbourne. Please check out these references which give a unique understanding of what we are as human beings.
1. www.dabase.net/dualsens.htm
2. www.dabase.net/unique.htm
3. www.dabase.net/dht6.htm
4. www.dabase.net/twoarmc.htm
sorry pal i dunno what went work...
but i just wanned to say that i really liked this piece... Strange that we never think about it..
will get back to u later. ok
well, i think that by all these definitions above, the word humble itself should never reflect your mind . in a world where everybody is truly humble, that word would not even exist... right?
human behavior is sooo complex. But the scripts make it sound simple.
a very good example is "desire"
we are not suppose to have any desires. But to get to that level u have to have a desire of not having any desires!
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